Cam Shares Post About Anxiety and Insecurities

January 11, 2018
Check out that look of concern! This was 2017, sending a pic to one of my besties- asking if I looked ugly/ridiculous/stupid. Before every show or public appearance I put myself through about one hour of anxiety, trying to fix myself up to match some idea of what I’m “supposed” to look like. Doesn’t matter if I have a stylist or make up artist helping me either btw, I still get anxious. Once I’m onstage it disappears, but it’s frustrating that I let this insecurity become a routine that eats at my time, money, confidence and ultimately reinforces the idea that I am not in control of my own worth. But I am. How I make people feel is how they REALLY see me. How ”beautiful” I am only really matters to shallow people (and industry losers), but usually they are so concerned with their own appearance they don’t really see me. Beauty is a made up set of rules to follow – an ever changing game we unconsciously agree to play everyday (esp on social media). But it doesn’t make my music any better, it doesn’t make me happier, and it’s actually a massive waste of my potential to put someone else’s ideas ahead of my own. So I’ve decided I’m gonna leave these insecure moments in 2017. I’m gonna save my give-a-fuck’s for magical stuff this year. Just like that. So here I go, looking however I look, without the worry, to more present and powerful experiences in 2018 #2018goals