Maybe you can feel it in the cosmic energy surrounding us, but Mercury is no longer in retrograde and Jupiter is probably not currently aligned with Mars. Your moon may or may not be in the seventh house. And who even knows when the age of Aquarius will be a thing again?

Meanwhile, it’s 2014 and more Americans believe astrology is an actual science than at any time since 1983, according to a study by the National Science Foundation (your tax dollars were spent on it, so you might want to check that out). Katy Perry is a believer and Buzzfeed recently published a lengthy story asking if we should all start taking astrology seriously.

We look at it a little differently. If your sign can incapsulate who you are, why can’t a three-minute song? With that in mind, we performed a careful analysis of the main traits of every sun sign, cross-referenced that with a list of musicians born under that sign, cross-referenced that list with their discographies and chose the one song that incapsulates each sign as performed by a musician of that sign. It’s exactly the same kind of science that goes into astrology, more or less.

Find yourself below. Who knows, it might be the song that aligns you with the universe.


ARIES: Lady Gaga – “The Edge of Glory”

Aries, the Ram, is one of those head-on signs, made up of action-oriented people who have ideas and then follow through with them. They might not follow-up or finish — that grunt work is for other people. They specialize in charging ahead and starting new ideas with gusto. They’re impulsive and can be fast to anger, but they get over it pretty quickly. They see themselves as free spirits, tend to be blunt and are rarely subtle.

One of the most Aries of Aries songs is from Aries singer Lady Gaga. It’s a song that gives Gaga a chance to talk about how great she is with the promise to be even better — she is on the edge of glory, after all. The beat is aggressive and quick. And there’s a sax solo, which is obviously letting someone else do the grunt work in a pop song.

TAURUS: Willie Nelson – “Ain’t It Funny How Time Slips Away?”


Taurus, the Bull, is a patient character. A Taurus likes things to be familiar and comfortable. You can’t rush them. You’d have to work like crazy to change their mind. And they hate change. If a Taurus likes you, they’ll buy you lots of pretty presents and they expect the same thing in return — it’s how they show their affection. If you make one mad though, expect them to hold a grudge.

Interestingly, Taurus rules the throat so most of them have excellent singing and talking voices. Adele, George Strait, Kelly Clarkson and Janet Jackson are all under the sign. But this Willie Nelson track, with its methodical, beautiful melody, tells the deceptively sweet story of two lovers catching up after a while. Listen to the lyrics though — that Taurus is still bitter about the break up.


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